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WWE
Randy Orton: Greatness has entered the ring! Thankyou very much, you may bow at will!
CM Punk: Kofi, Kofi's a huge fan, he does *this* in the car
Y2J:LAWLER! LAWLER! LAWLER! BY GOD JR!
Batista: Basketballs don't hold grudges
The Rock: And you step over the top rope, like that's meant to impress anybody!
JBL: Look at that goddamn haircut, do you think he understands anything?!
Matt Hardy: Fat bitch, you can't even fit out the door!
Stone Cold: Since you call yourself the Nature Boy, that gives me a question I've always wanted to ask you; What exactly is a Nature Boy? Do you like nature? Do you like boys?
John Morrison:If Santa came to the Palace of Wisdom we'd beat him up with candy canes.
Santino: Did you try the Pepsi machine?
Undertaker: Hey, can we stop and get some donuts?
Matt Hardy: I'm a better person than he is. Credentials or not.
Christian: I'm from Canada.
Matt Hardy: I'm from America. Yeah, stupid Canadian.
The Rock: Well damn Coach! You changed since the last time the Rock saw you! You shrank and got white!
Mark Lloyd: It's me, Mark Lloyd!
The Rock: Oooh, it's me, Mark Lloyd!
The Rock: Kane can talk, the big red retard can finally speak.
Gorilla Monsoon: This place is going crazy! Look at the Hulkster pointing to all of his Hulkamaniacs!
Bobby Heenan: He's not pointing to anybody, he's showing how high he can count.
John Morrison: I'm John Morrison, and I recently learned that marsupials are indigenous to Australia. The only continent to which they are found.
The Miz: And I'm your chick magnet, the Miz-
Morrison: Do you know what a marssssssssssupial is Miz?
Miz: I-
Morrison: Marsssupial?
Miz: I do not.
Morrison: I do.
Miz: Good for you
Y2J: He has the IQ of a kumquat, and I think I used too big words, I spoke too quickly, Randy got lost in the shuffle! So I'm going to ask the question slowly, I'm going to ask it with very short words, in a way that even Randy can understand - I'm gonna Ortonize it okay? Me, want, title, match! Very simple! Me want, title match! Randy can even understand that, if you don't, I even brought visual aids, just for you, Mr. O. Me... Want... Title... Match!
The Miz: I do cardio! Do nine hours a day!
John Morrison: Nine hours, that's physically impossible, when do you sleep? When do you sleep?
Edge: Kurt, you kick the snot out of Triple H's never ending nose and then we'll all go have cake!
Chris Jericho: We're dealing with the gore, and the whore!
The Rock: Ok class! What is... two... plus two? Do you know Booker? Oh yeah, I know the answer to that, 2 + 2, Thomas Jefferson, sucka!
Jerry Lawler: Our announcing table is wrecked!
Jim Ross: And we're not even Spanish!
Crowd Chant: Game cock, game cock, game cock!
HHH: I-I know it's confusing, I'm the game, that's the cock.
John Cena: I think it's like... bird spit. Which means we're like basically makin out with a pigeon right now.
HBK: And if you're not down with that...
Crowd Chants: We've got two words for ya! Suck it!!
HHH: You gotta wait for us, you can't just do it on your own! Wait for it, wait for it, this is Shawn's big part!
HBK: I never get my stuff in!
Mike Adamle: Jamaican me crazy, Kofi!
Morrison: Your mom's so fat she uses Mark Henry's belt extender!
Y2J:Well your boring personality for one. You want me to continue? How about saving us from that face that looks like you got flattened by a frying pan. Or your monotonous, robotic, Randy Orton voice. Or how 'bout I save us from your child-bearing hips, your super cuts hairstyle, your subscription to Blue Ball magazine?
Christian: Look, kazoos and steamers
Edge: Oh, streamers rule, long live the stream!
Christian: And long live the 'zoo. Listen, I can play our song.
Edge: You think you know me. You think you know me!
FIVE QUESTIONS WITH JOHN CENA
John: Michael Cole must be in charge, why? 'Cause this stupid *brawler* got an interview.How did you get an interview on WWE.com? HOW! Hate you. 'He talked about his action figure coming out in December' wow that's only 8 million years away might as well put him on dot com, right, might as well get a little interview about it, huh!
John: I-I built it up to big. I just about 2 seconds ago claimed this was the best five questions ever... Here's a guy, writing in to me, 'have I ever gotten into a fight with another WWE superstar'... What the *brawler* is that? Seriously, it's what I do! Every friggin day!
FRIENDS
Joey: You hide my clothes, I'm gonna do the exact opposite to you!
Chandler: What are you gonna do, show me my clothes?!
Monica: It doesn't make any sense.
Joey: Of course it does. It's smart! I used the-saurus!
Chandler: On every word?
Joey: Yep.
Monica: All right, what was this sentance, originally?
Joey: Oh. "They're warm, nice people with big hearts."
Chandler: And that became, "They're humid, pre-possessing homosapiens with full-sized aortic pumps?"
Joey: Yeah, yeah and hey, I really mean it, dude.
Monica: Hey Joey, I don't think we can use this.
Joey: Why not?
Monica: Well, because you signed it "baby kangaroo Tribbiani"
ONE TREE HILL
Peyton: Nathan just sent me an MP3 file...
Haley: Oh, that's just a virus.
Lucas: Nathan? What’re you doing?
Nathan: Haley hates pink!
Lucas: A clown.
Nathan: Yeah. They creep her out.
SUPERNATURAL
Sam: What do you wanna do, poke her with a stick. Dude, you're not gonna poke her with a stick!
Sam: I was sleepin with my peepers open?
Harry: I don't really like rats. They're gross. Rats are like the rats of the world.
Dean: Ed, listen to me. There's some salt in my duffel bag, make a circle and get inside!
Ed: Inside your duffel?
MISCELLANEOUS
SURVIVOR
Eliza: It's just a stick!
Jason: It's got a face on it. Don't worry!
James: The fish just bit me!
James: What in the Nickelodeon is going on here?
BIGGEST LOSER
Sam: There's so many of us, we're like... ants!
Sam: Lookin fine tonight!